16 years ago, I was newly married to Aaron and pregnant with our first baby. We were so in love- with each other and with the child we’d created. Having three kids from my first marriage, I naively assumed that in August, we’d have our newborn. My biggest worry was whether I was having a boy or a girl. I’d wanted a baby girl terribly, since I had three sons.
At our 20 week ultrasound, my biggest concern was gender. I couldn’t wait to shop, especially if I was able to buy girly things! Unfortunately, the baby was measuring a bit small and in a position where the technician was not only unable to gather the required measurements, but also wasn’t able to determine if there were boy or girl parts. She sent us on our way with an appointment to come back in a couple weeks.
In the days leading up to my followup scan, I was having some really weird back and chest pain that I’d never experienced in prior pregnancies, but I figured I had an appointment coming, and I’d talk about it then.
On the day of the appointment, the baby was still measuring small- she had barely- if at all- grown in the past weeks. The fluid was low as well which is a sign of the kidneys not working. The tech called in the doctor, who immediately took my blood pressure. It was in the stroke range.
I was immediately admitted, and despite every effort and medication they tried, I was getting worse. My platelet count was going down, and my liver and kidney functions were decreasing. I began getting severe headaches and my body was shutting down.
Despite the fact I wanted this baby, and would have done anything to have her, I needed to deliver to save my life. In doing so, she’d be so premature that she would not survive. Do you know what this process is? Abortion.
We call it a stillbirth because she was a wanted baby. But the process and procedure is the same. If I was unable to obtain the procedure, I would have died.
THIS is why I am pro-choice. By taking away a woman’s rights to a legal abortion, you are also taking away a procedure that saved my life. You don’t get to pick and choose. I get it, I totally understand the stance of those who believe that abortion shouldn’t be used as birth control, and that there are so many people out there who would love to adopt a baby. Believe me, I get it. But if we deny one, we deny them all and I don’t think it’s my place to decide if another woman in a situation like mine lives or dies.